Lucky?

I seem to have an awful lot of pet peeves. Right near the top of them are the people who think that everything good that happens to me or anybody else in that matter makes us lucky. Usually it's in conveyed in some stupid pre-teen girl fashion of "Luccckkyyyyyy" or something to that affect, but either way it's always annoyed the fuck out of me. Why? Because I didn't win the God damned lottery, nor did I win a new car. When have I been lucky? When I won a vacation to Montana. That's pretty much the only thing aside from Florida driving not killing me that has required me having good luck in these past few years.

Aside from that, everything that I have done, everywhere I've gone, and everybody that I've met has been a result of my own persistence and hard work. Nothing that I've done has been so spectacular that nobody else couldn't also do it if they were willing to have a job that made them the money to go on said adventure, follow through with actually going on that adventure and then making the best out of the time they spent on that adventure. What makes me 'lucky' compared to all of these other people is that I wake up 6 days a week to tolerate a job that I loathe immeasurably so that I can make money. With that money I pay for my own bills and take whatever is left and plan on going places. I actually follow through with going to those places and am also willing to exert myself so that I'm able to meet cool people or do cool things when I go to these places.

I know it sounds like some sort of asshole rant here of me trying to downplay the cool shit that I do occasionally get to do, but it's not meant to be. I do cool shit because I want to and I work harder than most people for it, not (usually) because it's handed to me. When I am greeted with "You're lucky" by a million people who I'm fairly confident are barely acquaintances much less friends, I'm not sure if I should be insulted that they think my life is so grand that things are handed to me. Going to a concert, doesn't mean that I'm lucky. I had to pay for the ticket, the gas, sometimes the airfare, the food, the hotel or whatever else. It makes me a human being that enjoys going to shows when I'm there, not lucky. Catching a drumstick or something, that can be considered luck at least, although I still had to work to be able to put myself in that position in the first place.

I know there are a lot of counterpoints there that I should consider myself lucky compared to people less fortunate than me. I fully agree with that when it's somebody that is going through rough times, ill, or whatever else and life genuinely sucks. I'll agree when it's somebody who works as hard as they can just to put food on the table. I don't agree when they spend their money on drugs, alcohol and stupid shit instead of whatever they wanted to do that makes me 'lucky'. I definitely don't agree when it's one of these many lazy people between the ages of 16 and 30 that feels this weird sense of entitlement of how others need to provide for them and feel no obligation to take responsibility for themselves and get a God damned job and be some sort of useful member of society. These are the people this rant was aimed at in the first place anyhow. I'm not as lucky as you are lazy. Got it? Good. Enough of bitching about this.

Nigga, Fuck Your Updates

While I'm in a writing mood tonight, I just realized that holy fuck I haven't updated this since December. Luckily for me nothing in my life has really changed. I waited for months for somebody who turned out to be a bundle more than I needed to deal with. I've seen some awesome shows and I have a bigscreen now. Beyond that it's just blah, blah, blah my job sucks, I'm bored with life and kind of lonely my family is batshit insane, blah blah blah. Thankfully the gym opened in March and for the past two months I've been going there almost every other night to pass the time instead of sitting online all of the time. While I enjoy my solitude, I also go fucking insane when I have nothing to do but sleep or sit on the computer while hundreds of my 'friends' lead productive lives on their end. Through my awesome friend Brittany I made a super fucking awesome friend, Kelly who loves my music and my taste in strange, often cheese smothered food. It's nice to have a friend here for the first time since Cynthia moved away. I've also made amends with two of my ex's which now puts me on speaking terms with four of the six at least. I still hope that one dies a slow miserable death however. That's really all there is to say for now.