This is the quote that my father repeats to the point of being disgusting to every house guest he has ever had. He insists that he always lives in a clean house and can't live like those people who don't clean up after themselves. However, I am fairly confident that most black people or people with any morals at all live cleaner than him. The other night he was complaining that there were ants in his couch but none in mine or anywhere else really in the house. Of course his couch emits a horrible odor that everyone fears except for him. He just lays in his own filth for days on end and doesn't notice anything wrong. So anticipating having company tomorrow albeit for just a few minutes I figured I'd clean the house just like every other night so that he doesn't have to lift a finger but still be able to claim how much he cleans. I cleaned the dog vomit off of his couch then swept the floors after cleaning the kitchen and garage. But I figured hell I should look under his couch to see if I can get rid of any of the smell. I pulled out the couch and found uneaten rotten cherries, cigarette butts, nachos, potato chips, crackers, ants, hair and a huge lake of dried piss. I had to pour water on it just to get the mop to pick it up and then resweep and mop the floor to get all of it cleaned up. The house smells relatively good right now since he hasn't gotten home to spill food all over the house to leave it there for me the next day and then give me his passive aggressive bullshit about how I should be cleaning up after him since I don't have a job it gives me something to do. I can't wait for freedom and to be able to take responsibility for any mess in the house and say that it's mine. So I'm going to play with the cat for a while now since he reeks of awesomeness. But attached is a picture of my living room floor underneath his couch so people don't think I'm exaggerating.
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